A Reddit user, a single father going by “Swimming-Age-2944,” sparked a debate on the platform’s popular “Am I the A——?” (AITA) forum after purchasing a house without consulting his girlfriend of four months. He sought the internet’s judgment on whether he made the right call. The user, who has two sons, explained his year-long search for a new home, driven by dissatisfaction with his current location – a 30-minute commute to work and a 45-minute drive to his sons’ school.
The catalyst for the dilemma was a seemingly perfect listing: a house located just five minutes from his workplace and 10-15 minutes from his children’s school, priced significantly below market value. Acting swiftly, he contacted his realtor, viewed the property, and submitted an offer, which was promptly accepted.
The complication arose from his relatively new relationship. He began dating his girlfriend in February 2024, with the relationship transitioning from casual to serious in September. Although they had discussed the possibility of having children together in the future, he maintained that such a decision was years away.
Upon sharing the news of his home purchase, his girlfriend reacted with disappointment, questioning his decision to proceed without consulting her. He attempted to explain the urgency driven by the competitive real estate market and the rare opportunity presented by the house. However, his explanation failed to appease her.
His sister offered a potential explanation for his girlfriend’s reaction: she might be envisioning the house as the potential home for their future children. While acknowledging this perspective, the Reddit user argued that expecting consultation on such a significant purchase after only four months of exclusive dating was premature. He further clarified in the comments that his girlfriend was aware of his house hunting endeavors for over a year and had even accompanied him on some viewings.
The majority of Reddit users sided with the original poster, emphasizing his responsibility as a single father to prioritize his children’s well-being. Many argued that four months was too short a time to warrant joint decision-making on a major financial investment like buying a house. Some highlighted the competitive nature of the housing market, justifying his quick action. Others pointed out that regardless of her desire to have children, his girlfriend did not have the right to influence his financial decisions at this stage of their relationship.
One commenter summarized the prevailing sentiment: “As a single dad, your primary responsibility is to your children. You have the right to make choices that prioritize your and your kids’ well-being.” This online debate highlights the complexities of navigating major life decisions in new relationships, particularly when children and significant financial investments are involved. The overwhelming response suggests a general consensus that the single father acted reasonably given the circumstances.
