The story of Myka and James Stauffer, once celebrated family vloggers, took a dark turn in 2020 when they announced the “re-homing” of their adopted son, Huxley. The decision sparked outrage and ignited a firestorm of criticism, leading to the couple’s departure from YouTube and a deep examination of their actions. Now, the three-part docuseries An Update on Our Family, produced by Vox Media Studios and inspired by a 2020 New York Magazine feature, revisits the scandal, providing a closer look at the events that led to the controversial decision. Premiering at the 2024 Tribeca Festival and now available on HBO and Max, the series resurfaces old videos from the Stauffers’ channel, offering insight into their journey before the scandal erupted.
The Stauffers’ Decision and the Aftermath
The Stauffers adopted Huxley from China at the age of 2½. Two years later, they dissolved the adoption, citing unforeseen challenges related to Huxley’s autism diagnosis. They claimed to be unaware of the extent of his disabilities. In a 2020 statement to PEOPLE, their lawyers, Thomas Taneff and Taylor Sayers, maintained that the decision was made in Huxley’s best interest, aiming to provide him with the optimal treatment and care. Huxley has since been adopted by a new family and given a new name. Despite numerous attempts, PEOPLE has not received any comments from either the Stauffers or Huxley’s new family.
Contradictions and Concerns: Examining the Stauffers’ Past Statements
The docuseries unearths numerous inconsistencies between the Stauffers’ initial pronouncements about adoption and their ultimate decision to re-home Huxley. In one since-deleted video, Myka Stauffer, a former nurse, confidently asserted their preparedness to parent a child with special needs. She described extensive consultations with physicians and research into various conditions, emphasizing their openness to adopting a child with disabilities. She even declared, “My child is not returnable.”
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This statement, juxtaposed with their later actions, raises significant questions about the Stauffers’ true understanding of the commitment involved in adopting a child with special needs.
Monetizing Huxley: The Dreft Advertisement Controversy
Further fueling the controversy, the docuseries reveals a paid advertisement featuring Huxley for Dreft laundry detergent. In the video, Myka described using the detergent’s “newborn scent” to “bond with” Huxley, a three-year-old at the time. This commercialization of their adoption journey, particularly in light of subsequent events, drew heavy criticism and accusations of exploiting Huxley for financial gain. The incident sparked ethical debates about the boundaries of using children in sponsored content and the potential for exploitation within the influencer marketing landscape. The video, titled “5 Things I Didn’t EXPECT About Our China ADOPTION!”, is now a stark reminder of the complex relationship between family vlogging, sponsorship deals, and ethical considerations.
Raw Emotions and Early Challenges: James Stauffer’s Breakdown
The docuseries also includes footage of James Stauffer, who continues to run his car maintenance YouTube channel, Stauffer Garage, expressing vulnerability during their initial trip to China to meet Huxley. In a video titled “Huxley’s First Smile After China Adoption!”, he tearfully acknowledged the difficulties of the transition, noting the strong bond Huxley had with his foster mother. He described the extensive care provided by the foster family, including trips to the beach, encounters with dolphins, and daily park visits. His emotional response, captured on camera, hinted at the complexities of international adoption and the emotional toll it can take on both parents and children.
Financial Discrepancies: The Cartier Bracelet Incident
One of the most jarring moments highlighted in the docuseries involves a video where Myka discusses reducing Huxley’s speech therapy costs from $500 to $70 per session. In the same video, she prominently displays a $6,000 Cartier Love bracelet, raising questions about the family’s financial priorities. The stark contrast between her expressed concern over therapy expenses and the display of luxury goods further fueled public anger and accusations of insincerity. The bracelet, which currently retails for $7,350 on Cartier’s website, became a symbol of the perceived disconnect between the Stauffers’ public image and their private actions.
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Online Sleuths and the Missing Car Seat
Long before the official announcement, observant viewers noticed subtle clues hinting at Huxley’s absence from the Stauffers’ vlogs. The disappearance of Huxley’s car seat from the family car, coupled with the deletion of comments inquiring about him, sparked suspicion and fueled online speculation. The Stauffers’ subsequent decision to privatize videos featuring Huxley only intensified the scrutiny. This online investigation demonstrated the power of digital communities in holding public figures accountable and raising awareness about potentially concerning situations.
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The Duct-Taped Hand and Other Controversies
The docuseries also delves into a deleted video from 2017, which originally showed Huxley with a duct-taped hand, seemingly to prevent thumb-sucking. The re-uploaded version omitted this footage, but internet sleuths uncovered the original, sparking further outrage and concerns about Huxley’s well-being. While the Stauffers later addressed concerns about a thumb guard, explaining it was recommended by their dentist to avoid surgery, the duct tape incident remained a point of contention. The controversy surrounding these incidents underscores the importance of responsible content creation and the potential consequences of sharing sensitive information about children online. The incident also highlighted the challenges of navigating parenting decisions under the constant scrutiny of a public audience.
The Stauffer Case: A Cautionary Tale
The Stauffer adoption scandal continues to be a complex and multifaceted issue with lasting implications for the world of family vlogging and adoption ethics. An Update on Our Family provides a crucial platform for examining the nuances of this controversy and encourages critical discussions about responsible parenting, the ethical considerations of online content creation, and the complexities of international adoption. The docuseries serves as a cautionary tale, reminding us of the potential pitfalls of performative parenting in the digital age and the importance of prioritizing a child’s well-being above all else. The series prompts viewers to grapple with difficult questions about authenticity, exploitation, and the responsibilities that come with sharing one’s life online.
