The age-old tradition of men proposing marriage is being challenged in the modern era, and one woman’s bold move to take the initiative has sparked a lively debate online. Talitha Degier, a 21-year-old, decided to break with convention and propose to her boyfriend, Bas, 24, documenting the entire experience on TikTok. Her decision has garnered a mix of reactions, highlighting evolving societal norms around marriage proposals.
A Modern Proposal: Taking Charge of Tradition
Degier’s TikTok video opens with a powerful statement: “They say you should never propose to your boyfriend.” She then proceeds to showcase the silver band she chose for Bas and a heartwarming clip of herself down on one knee by a picturesque fountain. The video culminates in a resounding “yes” from Bas, sealed with a joyful kiss. Degier’s caption, “I didn’t do it the traditional way and we are so happy,” encapsulates the couple’s excitement and defiance of traditional gender roles. In a separate video, Degier playfully captioned the proposal moment with, “I like your last name, can I have it?” showcasing a lighthearted approach to a significant life event.
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Talitha Degier proudly displays the engagement ring she selected for her now-fiancé, Bas. (Talitha Degier/TikTok)
A Divided Audience: Navigating Changing Norms
Degier’s video quickly went viral, accumulating over 205,000 views and sparking a heated discussion in the comments section. While some applauded her courage and celebrated the couple’s happiness, others expressed disapproval, clinging to more traditional views on marriage proposals. Comments ranged from supportive messages like “Stand Up Girl” and “I am so happy for you!” to critical remarks such as “May this love never find me” and “And the crowd is… confused?” The diverse reactions underscore the ongoing societal shift in perceptions of gender roles and expectations within relationships. One commenter aptly summarized the evolving perspective, stating, “Why is there so much hate? This is completely normal even if it’s a woman proposing or a man, it doesn’t change anything.”
Degier’s Response: Embracing Individuality and Love
Degier admitted to being surprised by the negative backlash, telling PEOPLE, “I did not think people would be so upset about it.” She firmly believes that couples should have the autonomy to define their relationships and traditions in a way that feels authentic to them. She encourages others to embrace individuality and celebrate love in all its forms, emphasizing the importance of choosing happiness over outdated societal expectations. “I think it is up to the people in the relationship to figure out how they want their proposal to go, and if someone does it differently you either be happy for them or scroll away,” Degier stated.
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The moment Talitha Degier proposed to Bas, defying tradition and embracing their unique love story. (Talitha Degier/TikTok)
A Love Story Forged in Strength: From Powerlifting to Proposals
The couple’s journey began at their local powerlifting gym, where they met through a mutual coach. Their shared passion for fitness laid the foundation for a strong connection, leading to open conversations about their future together. Degier revealed that marriage had been a frequent topic of discussion, and both she and Bas were eager to take the next step. A friend’s affirmation that a proposal from Degier would perfectly suit their dynamic solidified her decision to take the lead.
Three Months of Planning and a Surprise “Yes”: A Dream Realized
Degier meticulously planned the proposal for three months, ensuring every detail was perfect for the special moment. The couple embarked on a romantic trip to Sheffield, England, where Degier finally popped the question on January 24th. Bas, initially taken aback, needed a moment to process the unexpected but deeply heartfelt gesture. Overwhelmed with joy, he ultimately said “yes,” marking the beginning of their engagement and a future filled with shared dreams and mutual respect.
FAQs: Addressing Common Questions About Non-Traditional Proposals
Q: Is it becoming more common for women to propose?
A: While traditionally less common, women proposing is becoming increasingly accepted and celebrated as societal norms evolve.
Q: What are some tips for planning a non-traditional proposal?
A: Focus on personalization and creating a moment that reflects the unique dynamic of your relationship. Choose a location and method that hold special significance for you and your partner. Most importantly, communicate openly and ensure both individuals are comfortable with the chosen approach.
Q: How can couples navigate potential negative reactions from others?
A: Remember that your relationship is about you and your partner. Focus on your happiness and shared values, and don’t let external opinions diminish the significance of your commitment.
